I find people who are really into professional sports to be a bit bothersome. I understand being a fan and having interest in the entertainment of it all. But having dealt with people who are entirely too invested in a team, there needs to a prearranged limit to fan-dom.
1. You may own a jersey, teeshirt and hat. You cannot however wear them all at once, unless attending the game.
2. You can know the names and stats of the top 30% players on any given team. The rest of them are not worth knowing. Instead of that information, learn the names of the people representing you in the house and Senate, and know their stats. There's less of them and you'll have more to talk about when you need to seem smart in public.
3. If someone casually enjoys a team, and has no reason other than region to like that team, you're not allowed to berate them. A person's worth is not determined by a casual opinion. But it can be determined by an invested one.
4. Fantasy sports are really stupid and take to much time. And I've got myself a championship in one. I don't have children, but if I did they wouldn't have received any attention for those 4 months.
5. If it's not the playoffs and your mood is directly correlated to whether or not your team won, you may be punched in the wiener ( a swift smack of the breast for females).
6. You are not a member of the team you enjoy. Remember that when talking about them.
Breaking these rules doesn't make you a bad person. It makes you insufferable, so stop it.
No comments:
Post a Comment